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Thursday, December 07, 2006
Jokes =)
My prof has forward some jokes to us... he so funny.. b4 exam also sent us some, say let us relief stress.. Nw after exam he also send us some.. Realy nice prof...
Here are some of the jokes:

1--> An elderly couple were on a cruise and it was really stormy.
They were standing on the back of the boat watching the moon,
when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard.
They searched for days and couldn't find her,
so the captain sent the old man back to shore
with the promise that he would notify him as soon as they found something.


Three weeks went by and finally the old man got a fax from the boat's captain.
It read: "Sir, sorry to inform you,we found your wife dead at the bottom of the
ocean.

We hauled her up to the deck and attached to her butt was an oyster and in it
was a pearl worth $50,000 . please advise."
The old man faxed back:
"Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap."

2--> A funeral service is being held for a woman who had recently passed away.
At the end of the service, the pall bearers are carrying the casket out
when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket.

They hear a faint moan.

They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive!
She lives for ten more years, and then dies.
Once again, a funeral is held, and at the end of it,
the pall bearers are again carrying out the casket.

As they carry the casket towards the door, the husband cries out,
"Watch that wall!"

3--> When I went to lunch today,I noticed an old lady sitting on a park bench sobbing
her eyes out.

I stopped and asked her what was wrong.
She said, "I have a 22 year old husband at home.
He makes love to me every morning and then gets up and makes me
pancakes, sausage, fresh fruit and freshly ground coffee."
I said, "Well, then why are you crying?"

She said, "He makes me homemade soup for lunch and my favorite brownies and then
makes love to me for half the afternoon.

I said, "Well, why are you crying?"

She said, "For dinner he makes me a gourmet meal with wine and my favorite
dessert and then makes love to me until 2:00 a.m ."
I said, "Well, why in the world would you be crying?"
She said, "I can't remember where I live!"


4--> Reasons Not to Mess With Kids

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that a whale swallowed Jonah.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".



A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied," I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."



One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said," Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"



The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grownup and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
(Your Name) ♥ 10:46 PM
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